Last post about that Cunt Schilling

Gotta love the Onion

E Plubis my Assis

Do you know what the “The Argo” is? How about the “Liber Actorum”? What about the phrase “Sumus Primi? Any ideas? I’ll give you a hint, people that exit there are usually pretty smart! I’m talking of course about the Boston Latin School. Established in 1635 it’s the oldest existing school in the United States. Harvard which was established in 1636 is rumored to be built because Boston Latin pupils needed somewhere to go after graduation. The “Argo” is their school newspaper, “Liber Actorum” is the school yearbook and the phrase, “Sumus Primi” means we are first. It has produced four Harvard Presidents, four Governors of Massachusetts and five signers of the Declaration of Independence. Benjamin Franklin thought the curriculum too hard and dropped out! To this day its curriculum follows that of the 18th century Latin-school movement, which holds the classics to be that basis of an educated mind. In 2007 the school was named one of the top twenty high-schools in the United States by U.S. News & World Report.
Then can I ask you what the hell this is??




Boston Latin officials seek to quash 'vampire' rumors
March 26, 2009 09:55 AM
By Martin Finucane, Globe Staff
A school administrator wants to set the record straight: There are no vampires at Boston Latin.




The headmaster of the prestigious exam school took the unusual step today of sending a notice to faculty, students, and parents saying that "rumors involving 'vampires'" had begun spreading through the building Wednesday, causing disruption and anxiety for a number of students.
Lynne Mooney Teta asked everyone's help in calming the school community down.
"I seek your cooperation in redirecting your energy toward the learning objectives of the day. Please do not sensationalize or discuss these rumors," she said.
She also said she was concerned that some students' safety might be jeopardized because of the rumors, and asked students to report if any student is being harassed.
"At no time was anyone's safety in jeopardy," she said.
The notice, which was addressed to faculty and students and forwarded to parents, did not say exactly what the rumors were. Teta's office referred questions to a Boston schools spokeswoman, who didn't immediately have a comment.
"Seriously?" said Melissa Duggan.
Officer Eddy Chrispin, a Boston Police spokesman, said police went to the school Wednesday after hearing that some students were spreading rumors there were vampires in the school.
"I'm not sure whether [the supposed vampires] were among the student body or whether they were inhabiting the old corners and crevices of the building," he said.
"We did go over there and speak to some of the students and quelled the rumors that were going and kind of told them the effect those rumors could have on the rest of the student population," he said.
Teen interest in vampires has surged in recent months with the release of "Twilight,'' the first movie from a popular Stephanie Meyer book series. Last weekend, "Twilight'' sleepover parties were held in many U.S. cities coinciding with the DVD release of the movie, starring teen heartthrob Robert Pattinson.
The prestigious Boston public school was founded in 1635, and its students have included Ben Franklin, Sam Adams, John Hancock, Louis Farrakhan, Sumner Redstone, and Nat Hentoff.


I had to post this even though it has nothing to do with sports, just the absurdity of it is overwhelming. The school is open to only kids that live in the city, but that means the blue-bloods of Beacon Hill not the MASSHOLES of Southie! Though I could see it now, some kid, probably named O'Doyle or Callahan telling his buddy Patrick how he just bought these fake vampire teeth.

O'Doyle/Callahan
"Hey Pa-trick, looook at deees wicked funny teeth errraa swiped from the dot head at 7/11"
Patick
"OOOOHHH dude, yous gots to wear dem to school tomorra, scare da broads from Beacon Hill, it'll be a wicked pissa"
O'Doyle/Callahan
"I totally am bra, yous wait and see, we maybe get a day offffff, now come on, let's go smack dat darkie who dressed like the wolfman today"


This is what every news station is covering in Boston as I type, MASSHOLES!!!!

Tonight's Yankees/Red Sux game....

The Yankees and Red Sux played an exhibition game today down in Florida and you would have thought it was the regular season the way Sux fans were carrying on. It didn’t turn out the way the Yankees had hoped, do to some rookie players on the Red Sux squad trying to make the team this season.
It started in the third inning when A.J. Burnett was pitching to 6 foot 5, 300lb. Meat –Sticker Stingman, a recent call up by the Sux who they really think may be their next phenom. Burnett brushed the ball by Stingman’s shoulder and that turned him loose. Stingman charged the mound as Posada jumped on his back to tackle him, but ended up looking like Roy Rogers riding Trigger. Stingman proceeded to pummel Burnett’s arm, and only his arm until it completely broke free from his shoulder. Out of the dugout 7 foot tall Iron-Tooth McClaven darted towards first base and tackled Mark Teixeira from behind and quickly snapped his vertebra in two, as Robinson Cano tried to pull McClaven off of Teixeira he was gauged in the eyes and both his eyes fell out of his head. As if the scene wasn’t horrible already out of the bullpen came Shoehorn Cafferty and grabbed Hideki Matsui and Nick Swisher bashing their heads together like the Three Stooges, but this time both of their head shattered in centerfield.
John Sterling the voice of the Yankees was astonished at what he was seeing and was calling the entire thing as it happened, that’s when Spoon-Whipper Smith threw a cleat at Sterling but luckily he ducked… Susan Waldman wasn’t so lucky; she took the spike to the back of her head killing her instantly. The carnage didn’t stop until Federal Marshals were called in and stopped the bloodshed. The final toll counted seven Yankees dead and three disabled for life. After the game Theo Epstein was speaking to reporters about his new call ups to the team. “Well we really like what we see in Spoon-Whipper and Meat-Sticker but after this it could be hard for them to finish the season since they may be doing life in prison”.
Jon Kruk from ESPN noted on-air that he thinks that maybe the Red Sux were somehow trying to cripple the Yankees squad for the season so the Sux could take the American League East without problems. When reached for comment Larry Lucchino quickly dispelled Kruk’s theory. “We had some really good reports on Iron-Tooth McClaven when he was playing for the California Penal system, I mean the California North League. It’s just unfortunate that the first time we bring these guys up they kill half the Yankees, oh, well, too bad. Hey George good luck on the season”!

In this economy... Are you sure Fat Mouth?

I’m back! I want to apologize first as I didn’t notify any of you that I was going on vacation. After the pneumonia put me out for a while I needed more time to recuperate so we closed shop for a few weeks and took some time off. We figured it would be better to take time now before the season starts than during the summer (though I can’t guarantee there will be a week or two during the summer I’ll be out!)

What a day to come back to work to! The office of Ftheredsox is buzzing with excitement with the latest news. I would like to say I’m surprised but then I would be lying right? I mean I predicted this thing months ago, I new he wasn’t coming back, I new he was done. I am of course referring to Blabber Mouth Curt Schilling announcing his retirement today. In one cliché after the next The McDonalds’ Filet O’Fish Mouth Schilling thanked God of course, and his family. I have to get after my research department; I never knew that all of his kid’s names started with the letter “G”, Gehrig, Gabriella, Grant and Garrison, the next child will be Gay!. If you know why he uses the letter “G” for his kids please let me know and send your resume while you’re at it, since my research department is for shit!
I love how Born Again Boy planted his seed for Cooperstown already; did you catch his subtle hint? “That there are men with plaques in Cooperstown who never experienced one, and I was able to be on three teams over seven years…” When talking about winning a World Series. Yeah we get it Curt, you want to be in the HOF, ok. He actually has an ok shot for getting in when you look at the stats. I visited baseballreference.com and you can see who he compares to, some Hall of Famers in that bunch. Look, for all my bashing and stomping that I’ve put on Gaylord Schilling he wasn’t that bad of pitcher, I mean 3000 K’s is a lot!
Let’s get back to the retirement shall we…
I think I have discovered Curt’s new venture after baseball. He’s getting into Football; I mean why else would someone make an obscure reference to Don Meredith in 2009?? And the Refrigerator Perry comment? I couldn’t read it entirely; I was too busy doing the Super bowl Shuffle!! No, he won’t be heading to the NFL, too many blacks for Curt!
No, what Curt does next will be a mystery, for about a week, that should be enough time for him to say his official goodbyes, and see everyone he needs to see and what have you. But then the curtain is drawn, I mean before he was sort of still in the game, but now he is officially out, A FAT LOUD MOUTH, GUN-TOATING BORN AGAIN PREACHING, REPUBLICAN BLACK HATING, EX-BALL PLAYER. It will either make for a great sitcom or one awful biography.